The very first computer I ever touched was running UNIX. To be more precise: Computervision CADDS 4X. From there I moved onto Intergraph CLIX. Then I got to touch an Intel i386-DX4 PC running DOS and Novell Netware. If you couldn’t tell by now, I was a CAD slob. Yes, SLOB. Acronym for Stupid Labor On a Box. That’s pretty much it. In the 1980’s, a “drafter” was a mindless transcriber of engineer condescension and belittlement. But it paid pretty good, and sure beat working out in the sucky weather doing roofing (I had a lot of outdoor sucky jobs that paid little).

My first “mouse” was a 16-button digitizer puck. When I saw the first Apple mouse I fell out of my chair laughing hysterically. Mac nuts obviously take offense to that and start getting huffy and puffy about only needing one button. Now they act all heroic since the “mighty” mouse has finally caught up to Logitech (and in some ways surpassed them, but only for a little while). One button. Stupid. I don’t care what rationale you try to back that up, it’s stupid. I have four fingers and a thumb. I could “FLY” on CADDS and Intergraph with one hand on the mouse and the other on the keyboard. My typing rate with my left hand alone was close to 40wpm. Whatever. I made $6/hour back then. I was single and my only expenses were beer and gas.

In college I had to work on UNIX (Sun) in the CS labs, Mac OS7.x and OS8 in the math labs, Windows 95 in the English labs, and Linux (Slackware/X11) in the Physics labs. Each day I had to move from one lab to the next. Was I special? Hell no! We all had to do that. It was tedious but it was worthwhile. We eventually moved “up” to Solaris, OS9, Windows NT and RedHat 6/7 by the time I graduated. Along they way, we got to dissect and beat up NeXT, BeOS, and even Rhapsody (codename prior to OSX). Diversity was fun.

Why all the digression? Stay with me…

Most people that jabber all day about “switching to Linux” or whatever have only known Windows or (maybe) DOS their entire computer lives. DOS and Windows were second for me. I’ve been using Windows almost exclusively at work since 2000. Windows NT, then 2003/XP and now Vista and Longhorn are what I play with. I also have VMware, so I still stay familiar with various Linux flavors.

Still with me? You really have no life, do you? Press on…

I tried converting my home computers (note plural) to Linux to see how it would fare, but I ran into many of the well-known problems that other Windows boneheads run into. Especially as it relates to having kids. As it turns out, my kids have to be able to run their games, do their homework, and so forth. As much as I tried, some things just didn’t work. I’ve revisited the idea multiple times, and still do, as new Linux distribution releases come out.

So, what problems you ask?

• Games. Kids games don’t play for shit on Linux. Yes, some do. Most do not. Even with Wine, they play horribly. Kids don’t have patience for performance hits or graphics degradation. They aren’t bashful about complaining either.
• Homework. I would estimate about 75 percent of the documents they typed up in OpenOffice were fine for their teachers. 25 percent didn’t make the cut. The teacher would open it up in MS Office and immediately start nailing them for things OO didn’t do the way MS-Office does. Grades were duly noted.
• Media library. I tried Banshee, Amok, and just about every other media player/library manager I could find. The problem is that I have all my media on a server. MP3, AVI, MOV, MP4, WMV, etc. While they usually play things well, they do NOT like UNC pathing. They all seem to want a local drive mount. Trying to point them to a UNC path only caused problems (hangs, errors, crashes). Why can sucky-assed MS WMP deal with that easily but these supposed superior (however, uglier than shit looking) tools not?!
• iTunes. Yes, the dreaded iTunes. Possibly the worst piece of shit media app for Windows ever written (or hatched from a school of monkeys). As much as I hate using it, it works. There is simply NOTHING that suffices for Linux. Sure, I can move crap from my library or server to the iPod, but I cannot shop the iTunes store at all.  My kids would probably rate this item #1 on the priority scale.  It is a must-have.
• CAD. AutoCAD runs on Windows. AutoCAD is to CAD what Windows is to desktop computers: It simply dominates the world of CAD without question. I use AutoCAD a lot. Regardless of the promises competitors make, nothing replaces it with 100% true compatability. NOTHING. I know. I run tests all the time to make sure. I have not found a feasible, reliable, suitable solution for running AutoCAD on Linux. Period. Do not even attempt to suggest Wine or VMware to me. That is laughable for running things like AutoCAD, which is a floating-point and graphically intensive application. A native solution is mandatory.
• Printing. As much as like CUPS, it still sucks compared to native Windows HP desktop printer management. Printing from a Linux client, over a LAN to a Windows-hosted shared HP inkjet printer works “most” of the time, but for some things like photo-quality output, it lacks. The options are limited and not always recognized by the Windows service on the other end. It needs help.
• DVD authoring. I’ve been a fan of NeroVision for years. I’ve tried lots of other packages from ULead and others. Nero works best because it’s (a) reliable, and (b) simple. The built-in features are great. Not too much clutter, not too simplistic either. As advanced as you want to take it. I have yet to find anything for Linux that offers the same features. Not even NeroLinux. The ability to compile, transcode, merge, construct menus, covers and navigation controls, even fonts, colors, graphics, and burn a final disk (with 99.99% success) and fire it off in less than 5 minutes of work (the rest is transcoding and burning after all) is simply UNMATCHED by any Linux app I’ve found.

Sounds harsh, doesn’t it? It’s not meant to bash Linux. It’s simply a shopping list of what I need to bake my cake.  Some of you may think I’m baking an unrealistic cake.  Am I?  Is it wrong to demand more?  If we never demanded more, we’d still be using punch cards.

I would LOVE to not be tied down to paying insane licensing fees to Microsoft. I also don’t see any logic to throwing my hard-earned hardware out to go buy Mac stuff at this point. My wife would have me shot if I suggested that. “Honey, you know those five computers we have? What if I throw them out and replace them with Macs at roughly $1100 each?” (that’s a very conservative estimate too). Those would be the last words ever heard from me. “Yes officer, then I heard a loud bang, like a gunshot, from that house right over there!”

No. My optimal solution would be to (a) leverage the hardware I have already paid for, (b) replace each and every functional need for minimal or zero cost, and (c) remove the burden of upgrade fees for future software upgrades (at least for the operating system and basic apps). Like I said, I’m still looking. I have not given up. But I still haven’t found what I’m looking for. Oops. Bono sang that first. RIAA will be after me now I suppose.

This entry was posted on Monday, May 14th, 2007 at 7:43 pm and is filed under Microsoft, apPle, iPod, iTunes, linux, programming, techy-geeky, vista, vmware, windowz. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.